|
ON THE FRONT LINES with Freak |
|
|
ON THE ROAD WITH... FREAK RACIN’ THE BASESJOLIET, ILLINOIS Date 7/07/05
There’s nothing like steak and eggs for breakfast. Doesn’t matter if it comes off my grill or gets dumped in front of me by a surly waitress in some greasy spoon out in the sticks, I plan my entire morning around a chunk of flesh sizzling next to three eggs “up” and some coffee whenever possible.
On this particular Thursday however, my tank of Blue Rhino farted out just as the meat hit the grill and kicking the rig just served to knock my eggs to the floor. Turning for the fridge, my black lab Zakk happily devoured the spilled grub while I opened up a beer and braced myself for another day.
Racin’ the Bases is a NASCAR-sponsored event benefiting Victory Junction, a camp for terminally ill children organized by the Petty family.
Kyle Petty along with drivers Kurt Busch, Kyle Busch, Carl Edwards, and others join local hoo-haas like ex-Chicago Cub Ryne Sandberg, Olympic gold medallist/Chicago Bandit Jennie Finch, and ex-Chicago Bull Will Perdue for a friendly game of 12” softball.
Being a life-long Cubs fan, getting suited up for a game with Hall of Famer/Gold Glove winner Ryne Sandberg is about the best experience I’m gonna get in a locker room with another guy. I was gnawing his ear off the whole time we were changing and went nuts when he finally signed a foul ball I caught off his bat at a Cubs/Dodgers game back in ’84.
They introduced the teams and I got to line up between Carl Edwards and Jennie Finch on the first base line.
Taking the field, I was filling my shorts as I scanned the sold-out stands surrounding the perfectly manicured turf and standing there during the National Anthem, I guarantee you could feel the energy radiating off of my body in the upper deck.
Being the home team, we took the field first and my friend Brian was standing by the wall with a beer for me to slam as I left the dugout. It was exactly what I needed to help me focus, but it also set the stage for the rest of the game. Everytime we’d come in after retiring the sides, it looked like a bicycle race as a dozen or so cups of beer were held out for me to grab as I headed for the bench.
My first time at bat was interesting. I knocked the hell out of a 1-1 pitch putting it off the right-center field wall.
But as I rounded first base my drunken ass tripped over the bag and I went down. I kept stumbling until I finally gave up and literally crawled into second base just ahead of the tag blowing the zipper on my pants in the process.
I wasn’t wearing a cup so I was happy my jersey wasn’t tucked in or it would have been a rather embarrassing shot of me on the jumbo-tron. I would have to play the rest of the game dealing with the “wardrobe malfunction”.
The highlight of the game for me came on a routine ground ball which I flipped to Jennie Finch at second to force Sandberg.
Her throw to Kyle Busch at first wasn’t in time to turn the double-play, but we forced the Hall of Famer and that’s all I cared about.
We lost that game 9-3 but we also raised $56,000 which I guess was the point of the whole thing.
I went to Alfa’s 2 over on Jefferson Street afterward, to learn the game had been televised on a local station and the whole bar had been watching.
The ball-busting commenced immediately as they ripped me for tripping over the bag, getting tagged out at home, and of course losing the game.
But then again, that’s exactly what I expected since that’s what friends are for, right? |
|||
|
Web
Design By: All Rights Reserved © Hungry Mind Design 2005 |
|||
I’d taken the day off from The Zone to
raise some hell for charity down at Silver Cross Field, home of
the Joliet Jackhammers. 
I managed to worm my way into the festivities and took
full advantage of the situation. As a kid, I started playing baseball
at the age of ten and shortstop was my position before becoming a
voracious pitcher. I hadn’t seen too much action on the field as of
late due to the poor condition of my spine, but the surgery I had last
fall has me feeling like the rampaging alcoholic I was a decade ago and
I was ready to play like an all-star.