ON THE FRONT LINES with Freak

 

 

ON THE ROAD WITH... FREAK
by: Freak/Q101-FM


            

HARD ROCK VAULT OPENING BASH

Orlando, Florida ~  1/17/03 

  

Turd from the “Mancow Morning Madhouse” team and I stumbled out of Diamonds sometime after midnight and headed back downtown to start another day.  We made a pit stop on Taylor Street for some heartburn on a bun before grabbing another 12-pack at White Hen and going to Q-101.  Cow and the rest of the crew were already down in Orlando for the festivities but we had to hang back for a promotion. 

We continued drinking during the show, on the way to Midway, in the airport, on the plane, and on the way to our hotel.  Beer, Jaeger, and Vodka surged through our veins as we checked in with a nervous desk clerk named Martha

Arriving on the seventh floor, Turd opted to grab a nap but my belly fullof Red Bull and Jaeger would hear nothing of it.  I unloaded my bags in 712 and proceeded immediately to the hotel bar where I sat my ass down and continued to ingest a steady diet of beer along with some CNN

Lobby call was at 7:15 and as the others began to materialize, I was still anchored to the bar but was now being interviewed by a Canadian news team that thought I was Zakk Wylde.  Stashing a beer in my pocket, I left the embarrassed Canucks at the bar and headed over to The Vault. 

I’ve never been to a full-blown Hollywood type extravaganza so I was actually kind of giddy when we finally arrived.  Bright lights, a wall of media geeks, and the infamous red carpet all combined to make it a king-hell of an event.  I snuck around a power trailer, ducked between some velvet ropes, and grabbed a seat on the curb after snagging a six-pack of Killian’s and some finger sandwiches from the catering tent.  

It turned out to be the perfect spot since the red carpet began some twenty feet to my left and the line of limos ran some thirty feet to my right forcing all of the stars to pass directly in front of my position. 

Almost immediately, a drunken individual staggered up and plopped down beside me.  He was sipping from a tall glass of white wine and was cranked out of his mind.  “Should be a good show, eh?,” he spouted in a rough English accent.  “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”  He continued as I offered him a sandwich hoping it would shut him up. 

           It wasn’t long before the cavalcade began.  Zakk Wylde started it off, followed by Slash and Duff from Guns N’ Roses, Vinnie Paul and Dimebag from Pantera, Nikki Sixx and his “Baywatch” wife Donna  D’Arico, Dan Donnegan and Fuzz from Disturbed, Little Steven Van Zandt from the E-Street Band and even N’Sync’s Joey Fatone were among the folks strolling by. 

     “Well, I guess that’s it then,” the drunk quipped as the last car dropped off O-Town and pulled away. “Time to go have a look inside, eh?”  I turned to answer him but as I began to speak I went dizzy.  I’m not sure if it was the forty-one hours without sleep or the heavy drinking but I went light-headed as I realized that my new friend was Brian Johnson from AC/DC.  

     “What the hell are you doing here?” I asked trying to remain calm. “You should be over there with those guys, and… jeez, you’re actually the most qualified son of a bitch to be standing here!”  His bellowing laughter filled the air.  “Bullocks, I’m to old for this carnival crap.  I live a mile from here and just stopped off to see what’s going on.  Can you get me in?”  Christ, I thought, the singer for AC/DC wants me to get him into this thing.  “Follow me,” I said as we headed for the media entrance, “this shouldn’t be a problem”.

      We walked in and flagged down the dork running the operation.  “I need a pass for my friend here,” I whispered. As he turned to say, “No,” it became his turn to go dizzy.  “Is that Angus Young?” he stammered.  More laughter erupted from the drunken singer.  “Close jackass,” I snapped, “it’s Brian Johnson.”  

“Of course Mr. Johnson,” he gushed, “we’re honored to have you sir, right this way sir.”   He repeated as he led us away.  

             From that point on I got the full-on rock-startreatment with free beer, free food, and a private tour of The Vault. 

             Later, I was sitting in the VIP lounge with no less than four future rock ‘n’ roll hall of famers within sight thinking, “how did I manage this one?” 

                      “Screw it” I figured, and cracked open another beer and enjoyed the ride.

        

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